“Warning, the man who wrote this report really didn’t want to go see this show, in hindsight we should have probably insisted a little less but he owed us beer. after losing a bet behind a dumpster in the south side of town.”

When Partyboy told me we were going to watch a band that had the same guy responsible for one of the worst recorded turds from 2016, my expectations were low.

Somehow, even with low expectations, these fags manage to beaten them even lower, hats off to that shit. Anyway, Cave 45, first band “Son of Cain”, as if “Morte Incandescente” wasn’t the gayest metal in the world, they managed to make something even gayer than that. The music was terrible and the audience was half asleep, at least I was asleep so I don’t really know what happened, their music put me to sleep and while I slept, I dreamed of shitty music, I’m guessing this music came from reality.

I thought there was some kind of rock bottom of gay sounding music, but a few moments later, “Dawnrider” came along to prove me wrong. Everything was awful, from the keyboardist with a fucking slayer t shirt, to the other guys I forgot already. Here is a visual representation of what I think of Dawnrider:

Their shitty gay show dragged on forever with the blandest, most generic excuse for stoner I have ever heard, I reached my limit and bailed in search of cheaper alcohol.

Text by Hugh Dick