Ah… it’s a beautiful afternoon, the birds are singing, the sky is clear, the sun shines over the trees and rivers as the people shuffle around the sexy park of Serralves.
We came here to witness the opening of a contemporary art exhibition named Zéro de Conduit curated by the big shots of the museum.
Not that we really care about any of that no, no. We’re here because “Holocausto Canibal” is playing!
That’s right, amidst all this fancy art that actually looks kinda weird and retarded sometimes, one of the best grind/death acts in the country are about to lay down some gory tunes.
However…they played inside a really tiny black metal box. João Onofre’s box sized Die, an 183cm metal cube carpeted with acoustic foam all over. Other sensual bands have played here, Avulsed, Gorod, Unfathomable Ruination and even Holocausto themselves some time ago.
But we didn’t see that shit, so here we are now to witness the boxing and unboxing of Holocausto.
The idea is, these boys have no specific run time, they just go at it for as long as they have air inside the box, let’s do it!
So Holocausto start playing, all is well and good, very nice. Then they closed the box.
That’s it fellas, the rest of the show was spent wandering around, looking at the art or putting your ear against the box, trying to listen to the far away sounds of death metal.
Drinkin and talking with your buddies as well.
While all this frollicking was going on, some retards broke into our car and stole our laptop. You gross pieces of shit, I hope satan gives you cancerous aids on your ass and face which he will confuse for being so alike.
This was a massive meme loss for us, as well as some video reports, we’ll talk about those some other time.
Eventually, Holocausto ran out of air, museum staff opened the door and Orca came out of there roaring like an angry beast, it was fucking great!
Sort of made me wish they had kept the box open, still a good show though. Not worth our FUCKING LAPTOP but that’s alright, we are back on our feet and doing stuff, hopefully we get to see Holocausto Canibal again with more room, more blood, more pig’s heads and more chainsaws, especially more chainsaws.
Text, photos and video by J.P. Alves