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I am hearing angelic voices; I feel my hand being taken while my soul withered away. Might I say, this isn’t derived from the fact that I’m a ginger, but damn gosh-jolly, so soft this hand-grabbing is; I wish they just took me away by my Special Agent Johnson, but whatever! Am I being dragged to heaven? My, oh my!! Didn’t expect that, especially after oozing all over that fuckingly eye-popping artwork from Robin Clarijs.


Go check him out, it’s as gorgeous as a purple neon ass expelling vapors on Deckard Street!!

26 seconds passed and I’m still tripping to heaven, when suddenly… BAM!! I’ve arrived to fuckin’ hell!! Now, that’s more like it!!

After Game Over in 2014, and Nightcrawler in 2016, we couldn’t wait to see and hear with our dicks what the next step in the evolution would be.

Just the beginning of Death & Glory makes you wanna be in one of his events; (yeah, this guy’s huge in Hungary) we just follow him on Instagram and end up watching him perform live after Billy Idol or next to Quixotic (bro, careful with those thots, we’re watching you on Insta stories and Miami soundwaves can’t save your ass!!).

This guy feels like the devil, has a devilish girl, and I can’t seem to detach his whole being from a burlesque sense of style, which I just encounter in his inner soundings (UrethraWave anyone?).
So why hasn’t he played in Portugal yet? We’re always looking for more soldiers spreading the waves of our Lord and Savior Luci, and we damn well want to dance while drunkondrugs (see what I did there? A pun just to kiss Hugh Dick’s ass. He doesn’t smile a lot and I really want to be his friend, he’s so cool).

Anyways, this parenthesis became really long and my love for Hugh Dick is spreading rapidly in this extensive text about a great humane Hungarian person, who made me want to shake some booty thanks to those heavy beats, distorted soundscapes of hard basses, and all the references; samples that makes us live this fucking album.

I always end up listening to one of those 3 depending on my moods and strains, but this Death & Glory shit gets me fiery, pumped and cumming everywhere: I cum at home, I cum at the gym, cumming at work too and while walking to see my gramps. I just cum everywhere.
I just think that next time, Lazerov Punkovics could offer a pack of tissues with his album.
Yeah, I forgot, this guy gives you his music for free OR you can pay whatever you want!!

What’s not to love on a guy that does his thing with a full boner of passion?

Listen to his satanic-electro-darksynthwave-pump-up-the-jam-wreckingballesque-chased-by-the-cops-on-a-rainy-night tunes, which feel just like Speedracer feat. Quixotic inside an E30 from the mists going up to 88mph, and you’ll thank DoD for giving up their souls just to inform you of the wonders we’re living down here (the fact that I didn’t have a soul to begin with does not discredit my journey in joining Lazerpunk’s army of darkness).

As for me, after this really long text about a dude I find respectable as an artist, but also as a Human being due to his achievements (especially his Slav Squat technique), I just hope you’ll check him cuz we want him touring western europe. **

I’ll just leave you with wise words of advice from my Hungarian bro while I bleed my ears out with my favorite and first track from his latest: Ego Death.

“Listen to it, enjoy it, share it with your friends, and terrorize your neighbours with it.”








Quixotic could get some Miami love too!!


And the artwork guy, never forget the artwork guy




Text by Flama Jiberish




This Weekly Fix comes from the lands of fine wine and quick surrendering, France! If you think the french are behind on making music really weird and fun at the same time, you need to do some research, this country is on a Japan level of freaky.

Although our featured attraction is not the strangest act to spew from France, it certainly is a band you should have in your life, like that one girl who lets you do anal, you can never part with that one.


Trepalium make the grooviest death metal this side of the hemisphere, with a blend of voodoo and jazzy rhythms that swirls perfectly in your mind.

Unlike our previous Weekly Fixes, Trepalium have four full length albums for you to munch on as well as a few early demos, they even have some tunes with the guys from Gojira, in case you are into that.

Last we heard of these scary, sexy french dudes was their brutally groove filled EP “Voodoo Moonshine” which is already four years old. This is too long without Trepalium.

We also hear they are working on some new shit which is music to our ears! Well, it will be eventually. They seem to have changed vocalist though, this didn’t work out very nicely for other bands, but we shall see!

We leave you with one of Trepalium’s greatest tunes (to us at least), so good that it makes the rest of their repertoire sound stale by comparison, but trust us, this is a massive band, still waiting for them to come to Portugal.






Text by J.P. Alves




Prepare to get your cocks thoroughly banged and crucified by this Weekly Fix! Drunk on Drugs brings you a brutal Thai foursome, “Biomorphic Engulfment”!

With only 3:46 minutes of music so far in their debut demo “Pestilente Microparasitic Domination”, this band makes sure that you feel every millisecond of this demo in every cell of your body (we promise, next week’s fix will have more than one song available for ingestion).


From start to finish, this one song demo is an unstoppable train of furious drumming, brutal chord strumming and a cavernous growl from the goriest intestinal depths.

This band is being set loose on the public’s earholes by an extremely promising, eastern European label “Reality Fade Records”, who are responsible for other delicious bands such as Spain’s “MDMA” and Ecuadorians “Insalubrity” (the latter having a spot on our top 20 of 2017).

The master behind the mixing of this track is Ryo. No, not the ninja (that one is spelled Ryu), the talented Indonesian guy behind awesome acts like Pure Wrath, Cadavoracity, Perverted Dexterity and much more.

If you like trains of unstoppable drums and thick, filthy ass guitars, then this is for you! Only maximum volume will be acceptable, so don’t bother listening to this if you can’t turn it up, you might kill someone.


Stay tuned for next week’s fix, we jumped over a week because some retards broke into our car and stole our laptop, in case you missed the update.

A toast to our friend Pinto from Logotomy Designs for pointing us in the way of Biomorphic Engulfment and this WEEKLY FIX!



Metal Archives


Text by J.P. Alves